Relationship Choices

Earlier this week I wrote about attending our son’s wedding. In it I mentioned that he is my step-son. My husband was previously married and he had two sons with his first wife or his ex however you want to phrase it. I met Laura in the stands on a Friday night at a high school football game that our oldest son was playing in when Kyle and I were dating. At the time Kyle and Laura had been separated for a few years. Kyle and I talked about me meeting Laura and I told him that because he and Laura had children together and that they both would want to be part of their sons important moments, like a wedding, we needed to build a relationship with Laura so that the boys did not have to choose between their mom and dad.

Over the years we have come to a level in our relationship were we are friends. No not bosom buddies, but when we are together, Laura and Cory, Kyle and I, we have fun and enjoy being around each other. This is nice for us but can cause quite a stir to those around us that know the Kyle and Laura are exes. Even the families don’t quite understand it. I guess maybe they haven’t come to the level of forgiveness and healing that Kyle has.

It is often fun to observe others when they see Laura and I interact. Take for example this past winter when we all attended Kyle’s father memorial service. I was standing down in front of the church when Laura entered. She immediately walked up to me and the two of us greeted each other with a hug. You could hear a collective gasp from the first two rows of the church making it hard not to laugh out loud.. Then again at the wedding, Laura and I worked side by side, helped each other get ready and then celebrated our son’s wedding.

Laura and I respect each other’s rolls. She will always be the boys’ mom and I am their father’s wife. Laura knows that I love the boys and they know that too and I only want the best for them.

Laura and I made a choice to not create an issue over the past and that choice has been positive for everyone involved.